All I Want for Christmas is a Unicorn

Dear Santa,

We don’t want a lot for Christmas; we are already really grateful for the work we do in our amazing industry and our awesome clients. However, like you, we have a lot of people on our “Nice” list whom we are trying to make happy this time of year—all year, actually!  But while we employ the very best staff of “elves,” we sometimes find it difficult to fulfill the wish lists of our clients. (We imagine this is how you must feel every time, say, Olivia asks for a real live unicorn or Jackson asks for the Buffalo Bills to win the Super Bowl…) So, this year, in order give our clients the dream employees they are seeking, we’re asking a real wish-granting expert for assistance: you!

To help us stand out from all those whiney lap-sitters who demand the impossible from you, we’ve written our wish list as a poem:

First, we’d like a “Rainmaker,” a connected fundraiser with passion,
Her rolodex includes all of the LA Lakers and at least one Kardashian.

Our clients’ non-profit is a “best kept secret” she can’t wait to reveal,
Celebrity appearances and lots of exposure add to this influencer’s appeal!

Next on our list: “The Retired Exec,” who made millions when he was employed,
But the same old stock options and private jet trips have left him feeling devoid.

Navigating tough mergers and cutting big deals have always, before, been his goal,
But he now says transforming a non-profit (sans salary, of course) is a “mission for his soul.”

Our next request is a “Passion Player,” someone so committed it may give you pause,
We don’t know a thing about her hobbies or pets because she only talks of “the cause.”

Her intense devotion is rivaled merely by her talent, selflessness and efficiency,
And since she only sees daylight at her client’s events, she suffers Vitamin D deficiency!

On everyone’s list, we know, is the requisite: “peace on earth”
But how ‘bout “harmony in the office?” Now there’s an idea with some worth!

Please, Santa, bring us a “Peacemaker” someone skilled in the art of mediation,
With powers to persuade, to cajole, to finesse, and above all, create conciliation.

We know we’re asking a lot here, but if you could find room in your sleigh for one more…
We’re asking for “The Whiz Kid,” whose clear talents the Gates Foundation did ignore.

After being snubbed by the big wigs, despite being a financial virtuoso,
He’d gladly work for our appreciative clients, even if his salary is only so-so.

So, Santa, if you’re as magical as they say; if you’re willing, and if your sleigh can carry,
Could you please bring us the items on our Christmas list, and help make 2019 merry?

With love,

The Envision Consulting

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